Introduction

It’s okay to be not okay – a popular opinion nowadays isn’t it? Have you ever thought about why we want to normalize abnormality? Unknowingly, we are casualizing it by saying, ‘It’s okay’. We fail to understand that our goal is not to live with it but to become free from it. While the campaign was initiated to make seeking mental health easy and stigma-free, this has recently transformed into making people feel okay with their abnormalities which in turn, hinders with their treatment compliance.

This blog will help you understand the difference between accepting our condition and striving for change versus giving in to discomfort without attempting to overcome it.

Understanding the Comfort in ‘Not Okay’

While this affirmation was spread to make people less worried about their abnormality, it feels intimidating to find people starting to flex their weirdness rather than trying to get it treated. It has levelled up from accepting to feeling distinctive in being ‘not okay’. This makes the situation even worse. Even though they break the stigma to get treated, this attitude prevents them from becoming normal. This reminds of a saying,

“We perceive what we expect to perceive.” — John L. Locke

The concept of ‘perceptual set’ in Psychology clearly states this phenomenon. When the label was painful, people wanted to get rid of it. However, when it was propagated as ‘okay’, the same label didn’t bother them to take any action. They continue to carry it, even after getting treated. 

When this state provided them validation, freed them from responsibilities, and earned them sympathy, they had no desire to leave it. May be, because everyone has started to view abnormality as ‘okay’, so this no longer seem to be needful of a treatment – just the validation, affirmation and empathy from those around them seem to suffice. It is sad to note that the society’s acceptance has unintentionally enabled comfort, leading to stagnation.

The Thin Line Between Acknowledgment and Avoidance

There’s only a thin line between acknowledgement and avoidance, and it’s simple to crack the code. Acknowledgement means accepting your problem and making the needful changes. This helps you understand your condition, recognize that ‘you are not okay’, and take the necessary steps to be alright, freeing from distress.

On the other hand, labelling your impaired condition as normal will lead you to avoidance. It makes you resistant to treatment because you no longer see your condition as problematic. You’d identify as normal when, in reality, you are not okay. 

When you accept your condition and strive for a positive change, you open the door to self-improvement. Nevertheless, when you struggle to acknowledge your unhealthy state, you create a barrier to growth. This is why it is crucial to stop normalizing the ‘not okay’ state.

Consider this situation: Initially you feel a burn out and you tell yourself that burn outs are just okay. Here, you start to procrastinate your work and your recovery from the situation as well. This procrastination can cause feelings of worthlessness which pushes you to an inactive stage. The cycle continues until depression overtakes you. So, always remember that, telling yourself that ‘it’s okay to be not okay’ can not help you to get away from that state. It can only protect you from the stigma but when the right action is not taken it will make you even more careless about your condition. 

Why Growth Matters Even When You’re Not Okay

Being at a low is quite alright. But it doesn’t mean you have to continue to be in that state just because ‘it is okay’. Growth unfolds anywhere and at any moment. These low moments can also be a time for growth and self-realization. This phase should be approached with more awareness and care, as it may serve as a pathway to understanding and exploring your inner self. Simply saying it is okay, being inactive and procrastinating can be futile. Instead, acceptance, exploration, and seeking support can work wonders during this time.

You often discover your true self, especially in the most challenging moments of your life. However, this doesn’t mean you remain stuck there forever. What truly matters is how you rise from it – more stronger and resilient. 

Making daily efforts to improve will boost your confidence and self-image, gradually strengthening your sense of self-worth. You will be able to break the challenges and get better. After this phase of acceptance, you will find yourself more composed. The next stage is to recognize that seeking professional help whenever you need is completely – without any hesitation or overthinking. 

Practical Steps to Move Forward

Acknowledge: Accept your current state without judgment.

Acknowledging is the initial and a very crucial step. You either accept your condition and proactively work on it for a better change or label yourself and live with it. This is a thin line in which most of them slip. 

Plan: Set small, actionable goals to gradually improve.

Having big dreams is great, but they cannot be achieved through heavy, strenuous goals. Planning your short term goals wisely is important to reach greater heights. Set small and plausible goals, like climbing small steps.

Seek Support: Encourage therapy, self-help books, or support groups.

Seeking support doesn’t make you weak in any ways. Reading books, and joining support groups can help in your mending journey. Go for therapy sessions when you find it necessary.

Act: Take consistent steps, even if small, towards being “okay” again.

Being consistent means showing up daily which does not necessarily need you to be perfect all day. Days of highs and lows are quite common. Taking actionable steps isn’t any less productive in this journey. The goal is to be okay again.

Challenging the Misinterpretation of ‘It’s Okay to Not Be Okay’

“It’s okay” is okay as a temporary state. But the goal of therapy, even psychology, is not just to make you feel okay, but to help you become fully functioning and mentally sound. To achieve this, discomfort shouldn’t simply be accepted; it should be challenged and managed effectively.

The ultimate aim is to become a happy individual, free from labels and burdens. Pain and discomfort should be embraced as a catalyst for growth. Healing doesn’t come from passive acceptance, but from your active efforts to transform. 

Conclusion

This blog was essentially written to make people understand that accepting your problem and carrying the label either as a fate or flex is not the way to handle stigma. Instead, knowing your condition and being mindful of the change you need is important rather than just surpassing the situation.

“It’s okay to be not okay, but don’t let it define you. Reflect on where you are and ask yourself, “Am I moving forward?”

Embrace the struggle while striving to overcome it.